Time to stop caring what people think
What if people laugh?
What if people think I’m stupid?
What if people I know, see what I’m doing?
What if my ideas are dismissed?
What if…
It can be a never ending cycle. One that can be really hard to break.
Those “what if” thoughts are the ones that often stop us from going after what we want.
Especially when they are tied to the opinions of others.
“You probably wouldn’t worry about what people think of you if you could know how seldom they do.” - Olin Miller
I’m guilty of falling into the trap. Many times. And still do today.
It’s also a theme I come across, often, with clients.
And here’s the thing, when you reframe the “what if” from a negative to a positive, it’s game changing.
What if people cheer for me?
What if people see how knowledgeable I am?
What if people who know me, refer me to people who don’t?
What if my idea is great?
One of my favourite questions in a coaching session is - “What if the opposite is true?”
And often, it’s not something that people have even thought about.
In one coaching session, I had a client who’d been working on a project for a long time, and they were hesitant to post about it on social media because of what other people might think.
After working through the “what ifs” and looking at some strategies around how and when to post, they went ahead and hit the publish button.
Do you know what happened? They had lots of lovely comments from the people they knew, including people they hadn’t spoken to in a while.
This was such a huge confidence boost for them. And it really helped motivate them to take the next step in the project.
The fear of what others would think was holding them back. And the smile when they shared what happened and all the lovely positive comments they got, was a milestone worth celebrating.
Next time you find yourself in a negative “what if” cycle, break it. Start with just one positive “what if” and see what happens.
And if you find yourself surrounded by people (even just one or two), who do judge you or make fun of you or who don’t support you…then this quote below from Amy Poehler just might be for you.
“I want to be around people that do things. I don’t want to be around people anymore that judge or talk about what people do. I want to be around people that dream and support and do things.” - Amy Poehler
Here’s a little Bon Jovi with some motivation to help you work through those “What ifs”.
Article first published on Marketing Life. You can subscribe for free here.
